I have been away from the VC for quite some time. I feel that I am alone and every time I allow a vampyre into my life full of love and trust they betray my heart by leaving me. Is it me, am I the common factor here? My hubs and I have been a part of the VC for some time, however in our local world the VC is very small. It seems that when we allow other Vampyre into our lives, something happens. Not a fight, or even a misunderstanding, they just go away. I think of myself as an insightful individual, however I am not able to see why my friends go away. My first heart break was the girl who I awoken with. Her and I were coven mates before hand, and well…after a deep trance meditation it just started to happen. We practiced feedings and learning how to live healthy together. but 2 years latter, she just became “too busy” for me. She left the VC and claims now she was never a vampyre. But that was ok, I still had my bestie. Years later my Bestie reports to me, he thinks he has always been Vampyre however was repressing it (somthing I had always suspected) it was fun watching and helping him become his Vampy self… but… 2 years latter… he became too busy… I did nothing wrong, he tells me…. Just busy. but then he blocked me, and turned his back on me. My heart is still broken from that and now I dont know what to say, what to think. who am I? What kind of monster am I that those who I love leave. My life is full of love, and I am not alone. However, many times, when a thing happens, a song (Tori Amos) a topic being spoke about, etc… I think of him, and my hear breaks all over. Perhaps some day we will meet again, but untill that time I will remain, utterly…alone
I’ve been teaching a group in the large residential substance abuse center I work at. I was invited to teach these Native American workshops to our Native American clients as I am part Native myself. I am Wintu (California native) among a few other things so when I was asked to run these groups on topics like “mending broken hearts” and “12 steps around the medicine wheel” I jumped at the opportunity. I have learned more in the last few months about my culture then in my entire life time, however what I have also learned is a unique way of understanding life (an death) its self.
The process began during the first day of mending broken hearts where my co facilitator and leader of the group (he has taught for a while already and is also Native) began to talk about the prophecy. As the prophecy for told, during the 7th generation after the genocide of our people, a white buffalo will be born, and from its birth will come a time of peace, and understanding. This is the 7th generation and in 1991 a white buffalo was born. From it came the time of healing where our elders when from state to state, forgiving all the wrong that was done to our people.
One of the things we teach in the class is the idea that we are broken for a reason, we are broken because our ancestors were broken by the government of old, and that we can only heal when we let go of the ancient rage within up. Letting go of this rage, this hate, and sadness we will then begin to heal. We will then find a way of forging why we were angry in the first time. Why we allow ego to run our lives, and why we choose to hate. You may be reading this and wondering why I am posting this, in a blog for vampyres, what does this have to do with any thing here. Allow me to explain.
The GVC is ongoingly upset with each other, ongoingly fighting, and ongoingly causing issues for one another. Have you ever wondered why? Why do we fight, hate, call names, troll, and cause drama? Is it boredom, are we evil? No, we are feeding on the residue of the hate of our ancestors. We take in energy as a normally every day way of being, we take in energy from people, plants, rocks, blood, food, everything is energy. How many members of the GVC think about where their food comes from, I mean, REALLY comes from? Has that person truly let go of the hate of their ancestors? Hate within the energy of the ancestors is not limited to Native Americans, many other travesties have occurred, the ancient hate is world wide.
You may ask, what can I do? How can I change the energy flow of the whole planet, how can I make a difference. We are the 7th generation, the prophecy explains that healers will come together, and that there will be more healers on this planet during this time then any other time. SO do what we are meant to do, heal! Once we heal our selves we can heal each other, once we heal each other we heal the earth, the plants, the trees, and the people. Miracle was the name of the white buffalo that was born in 91, she lived 10 years. But she lives a little in all of us. Never fear, choosing to heal and not break does not make you less of a vampyre, or an otherkin, or a what ever you relate to being, it only makes you part of the solution. Join me, join the 1000’s of other healers, help redirect the energy flow, from hate and sadness, to love and healing.
We are all energy, everything you see, smell, touch and feel has an energy wave that is as distinct as a fingerprint. It is scientifically proven that we all have the ability to move energy. An article I read found here at this site( http://sciencelearn.org.nz/Science-Stories/Tsunamis-and-Surf/Waves-as-energy-transfer) is quoted as reporting, ” In electromagnetic waves, energy is transferred through vibrations of electric and magnetic fields.” Everything we see, feel,touch, smell, and taste consists of small traces of these electrometric energy waves. As I sit on the floor bed of the redwood forest and look up into the tree tops and onto the sky I feel the every transference, between the trees, the rocks, the plants, and myself. I lay there, taking in the energy, plugging myself into this energy stream. I ride the wave of energy as I allow it to cleanse my energy, align my chakras, and bring me to health and healing. This energy is real, it is tangible, however so is that of all things. We all contain both electric and magnetic fields. These fields are what create our individual, and very distinct energy waves.
Keep in mind that energy brings us all to the place we are emotionally as well. Take for example; every walk into a room of people arguing? The negative energy has filled the room, and those feelings now flood your personal space, your personal energy bubble. You take sides and start in with the argument as well, or perhaps you sit back and watch, feeling angry that these people are causing such a ruckus. Either way, that negative energy has now sucked you in. Without thinking about why, that energy wave has washed over you and you too are now part of that energy stream.
Energy is energy, it can be changed, it can be manipulated. Energy is what gives us life, it feeds our emotions and created the mood for our days. According to Riki today (http://www.reiki.org/reikinews/sciencemeasures.htm) “As in many other areas of investigation, what we were absolutely certain about 20 years ago has changed dramatically. For example, in a few decades scientists have gone from a conviction that there is no such thing as an energy field around the human body, to an absolute certainty that it exists. Moreover, we have begun to understand the roles of energy fields in health and disease. Most people are simply not aware of this research, and persist in the attitude that there is no logical basis for energy healing.” Lets go back to that crowded room of arguing people for example, the ability to change the mood is there, to redirect the energy stream and create one of peace, by creating a change in the energy within this room, the people will start to follow with the energy flow, they will become calm, and the argue will stop. I use this technique weekly of not daily at my place of employment. I work with a large clientele of female drug addicts, trying to get their lives back on track, trying to learn how to not use dope and be happy, but its a hard road and often leads to rooms full of negativity. I teach a number of therapeutic groups from art therapy to anger management however one key factor remains within all of my groups and classes, an energy transference that the clients are unaware of. Seen like a wave passing through the room, a wave of calm, or focus, and of peace. It has been reported my clients that my groups are the most calm and focused, once my supervisor called me in and asked me my secret to keeping my groups focused so that I can share my techniques with my co workers. Its not like I could say, “Well Boss Lady, I am a Vampyric witch, so what I do is eat all the negative energy and fill it with healing, calm, focused energy.” Nope, cant say that. I told her some BS about keeping my self calm and focused seems to help the class as a whole. But truth be known, it is much more then that.
Energy waves, Energy Flows, Energy stream, whatever you want to call it is real. Take ones Aura for example. Nikola Tesla first discovered the ability to take a photo of ones aura, this created a whole new study of the energy that is visible around all things. All things have an aura, or an energy bubble. As a healer it is important to keep ones own energy waves in check, so that healings of others can take place, however even if you are not a healer, personal energy health is important. One great example of energy health is a tree of life meditation. A basic meditation where once in a meditative state you visualize your self as a tree, growing tall, branches reaching up to the sky, and roots growing deep into the ground. Allowing all negative energy to ground down into the roots and out into the ground, and pulling in positive energy from the sky the clouds, and even other plants. Allowing this clean, pure energy flow to fill your energy bubble, or Aura. This will leave one at peace and clean from negative energies. I personally do this meditation every day after work and some times in the middle of the day as needed.
Energy wave health leads to energy healings, healthy energy can lead to closer families and communities. I challenge everyone reading this to commit to a year of energy health. Feel the difference.
I ask this question often, who am I? This question is what drives me, this question gives me the push to be a better me, to be the best me.
I was born in a small rural town about 20 min out side of Bodega Bay California. I spent my first 10 years on a 14 acre farm, laying out under the shade of the barn, feeling the Earth beneath me, I could feel Mother Gaia.
I was given my native Name or Fire hawk at age 5 when I was spending the day with my grandmother while we visited the tribe. That night I dreamt I was a hawk all night, flying, feeding, sleeping. This I believe was my first awaking. AT this point in my life I became very aware of the spirit world, and of how deferent I was then other children my age. The years went on, I remember always knowing that I was a healer, and by the time I came to reading age I started reading about healers, mostly fairytales as a child, however as I grew older I began reading about healing techniques from all around the world. I would study an area, test it out and then move on to another type of healing. I was almost obsessed by this during my mid 20s, I had just dug myself out of a three year drug induced addiction phase. My time using Meth was harsh, however I came out stronger then ever. It was also about this time I learned I have the ability to manipulate energy. Not only did I learn how to change things through energy, from healings to changing street lights, I also became hungry for energy. I learned I feed the best on gifts my Mother Gaia gives me. I started taking from the trees, and the earth, only after gifting Mother Gaia.
AT this point I was a young mother in a very abusive relationship. This is about the time I realized I could harm my now ex through energy. Making him sick so that he was to week to hit me, or yell at me. I started to find my power, my strength. It was at this time I found myself expanding once again in my second awaking. I changed, I became more away of the astral worlds, as well as my abilities to talk to the dead turned from feelings and smells to seeing the dead through my minds eye, like they were flesh and bone. At 32 I moved out on my own with my 12 year old daughter and met my true love. Lucian and I began doing energy rituals, and formed our house by the time I was 35. 35 was a big year for me, I had my third awaking at this point, I became so hungry I started feeding on everything! Power cells, people, plants, EVERYTHING! I worked hard learning self control. The sprit world became as real to me as the physical one, and I learned how to take control of my dream worlds through lucid dreaming. I was working as a teachers aid for special needs kids and learned that I could eat the chaos in a class room thus calming the children and their bitch old teacher. And the years kept moving on.
So here I am, today. 44 years young, a healer, a witch, a Vampyric High Priestess who has grown sick and tired of the bickering and segregation of the greater Vampyric Community. I stand here willing to do all I can to help promote change and healing.
This is why I have started this blog, and is why I thought that my first blog would be about myself. SO, those who choose to read will understand who I am, and why I do what I do.